Moving Abroad? Avoid These 10 Mistakes

Introduction: Welcome to Badass Digital Nomads, where we're pushing the boundaries of remote work and travel, all while staying grounded with a little bit of old school philosophy, self-development, and business advice from our guests.

Kristin Wilson, Host:    00:00:20    Hello, Bonjour, Buenas Tardes, Buonasera, Good morning, afternoon, or evening, wherever you are in the world. Kristin, from Traveling with Kristin here, and welcome to episode 126 of Badass Digital Nomads, 126. Guys, that's a lot. We're getting up there. <laugh>. There are only two weeks left to enroll in my brand-new relocation program Ready to Relocate, which will take place from October to December of 2021. This is the first time that I'm ever sharing my exact process from start to finish for how to relocate to another country. This is a proprietary process that I have created, developed, updated, and refined over the past 10 plus years since founding my online relocation company. But it's based on concepts that I learned as far back as 2002 while studying international human resources in Australia. Spaces for this first course are limited, but if you want to move abroad in the next year or so, but you're unsure of where to start, overwhelmed with all of the information out there or just want some guidance and support along the way for what to do and when and what order, then you can apply for a free relocation strategy.  

Kristin:    00:01:55    Call with me in the link, in the show notes or at travelingwithkristin.com/apply as this topic has been on my mind a lot lately, and from hearing from so many of you of some of your struggles through where to start in this process, which steps to take next, I wanted to cover 10 of the most common mistakes that I've seen people make while relocating since I personally lived abroad for the first time back in 2002. So you guys know, I like to talk about some of the pros and cons, doss and don'ts and mistakes of living and traveling abroad, but it's definitely something that you learn a lot about through personal experience. And so that's why I'm sharing some of my mistakes and mishaps and those of my friends and clients with you here today. But I also don't want you to be so hard on yourself if you don't know everything there is to know about moving to another country, because after all, this is not something that's taught in school. 

Kristin:    00:03:04    I mean, as adults, we know the shortcomings of the public school system, and I'm sure that's applicable to you, whether you're from the US or any country in the world. We don't need to go too into detail about the shortcomings of this system. But suffice to say, it was created to help create productive members of society, to help teach things like reading, writing, arithmetic, and prepare people to enter the workforce. If you think of it along the lines of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, public school is addressing the bottom two levels of that pyramid. So those are your physiological needs and your safety needs. So we're talking food, shelter, clothing, personal security, employment, health, acquisition of property. But even on those bottom levels of the pyramid, the public education system falls short. There are still so many people living in poverty around the world, including in developed societies.  

Kristin:    00:04:16    So even if traditional teachers or politicians or your local school board knew about things like the concept of voluntarily traveling or relocating to another country, they wouldn't necessarily teach it because you wouldn't wanna invest 13, 17, 20 years in a public education system just to have their workers then leave and become productive members of another society. And so the reason that a topic like relocation can be so hard to wrap your head around sometimes is because it's complex on a logistical level, it's not taught in school or in society. And then it also combines a lot of different levels of Maslow's hierarchy of needs together because when you're voluntarily relocating, it's typically four reasons in the third, fourth, or fifth level of that pyramid, community, belonging, sense of connection, self-esteem, freedom, self-actualization, it involves those top tiers of the pyramid. But then it also involves the bottom ones, the physiological and safety needs when it comes to budgeting, cost of living, safety and security in other countries, and starting from zero when it comes to day-to-day life, finding food, shelter, and adapting to a new society.  

Kristin:    00:05:57    And so you guys know about philosophy with Kristin. I like to look at the foundation of things and then create a framework to help you understand them, but also understand why they're difficult to begin with. And so that's why relocation can sometimes feel so overwhelming and why it can take years of thinking about it and mulling it over before you can come to the decision of if it's the right thing for you to do in life, if it's a goal or a new phase of life that you want to move into. And then how to actually put that into practice, how to implement the steps to achieve your goal. You know it's not something you learned in school, it's not something that your company is likely a proponent of. It might not be something that your family and friends understand. And so you're just dealing with all of these different challenges at the same time.  

Kristin:    00:07:01    And so if you've ever felt frustrated or like it's taking a long time to get from point A to point B or that you've been spinning your wheels, I just wanted to share a little bit of my insights into why this process can be so complicated and take so long because there's a steep learning curve, but there's also a lot of other factors at play, and that comes from the hard logistics of a move and managing that as well as the soft skills, the interpersonal skills, the communication language barriers, adaptation to another country and everything else that happens in those months and years after you make this sort of life change. So I wanted to just bring to mind 10 of these mistakes that I've seen people make so that you can identify them, anticipate them, and hopefully avoid them on your own journeys. Before we get started, thank you to Holcom from the United Kingdom who left a five-star review on Apple podcasts recently.  

Kristin:    00:08:09    He says, super informative podcast, love Kristin's style and knowledge on all things digital nomad and living the expat life, both the pros and cons. Great guests too. Thank you so much, Holcom. And if you agree and have also found this podcast informative, we would love if you could take a moment to rate and review on your favorite platform. You can also go to lovethepodcast.com/digitalnomad for three easy ways to leave a review. And now let's get into 10 of the most common mistakes that people make when moving abroad. The first thing that I noticed, and this is because I started my career abroad by working in real estate in Costa Rica, is the tendency for people who are moving to another country to buy real estate first. At first glimpse. This seems quite logical, especially if you're coming from a country like the US or Canada where home ownership is at the forefront of society.  

Kristin:    00:09:19    This is the American dream of owning your own home, and it's just a thing that you do. Like going to school, getting married, having kids, buying a home is just one of those things to check off your life to-do list. But the mistake in buying real estate when you go to another country is that a lot of people do it before they live in the country. So the stakes are a lot higher. If you're living in your hometown or in a city that you've lived in for a long time, you're probably familiar with all of the neighborhoods. You might know a specific area that you want to live in. You might be familiar with the real estate comps in your local market, but when you're doing that in another country, it's completely different. So the first thing is that in a place like Costa Rica and in most countries, if you're a foreigner, you can't just get the type of credit lines and financing that you can get in the US, let alone interest rates.

Kristin:    00:10:20    Even if you are eligible to get a loan to buy property in that country, that interest rates might be astronomical. So the process of buying property in a foreign country is usually quite foreign, even whether or not you can get actual title to the property or if it's just leasehold property. But the bigger mistake is for people to buy real estate in a place that they haven't lived in yet, and to invest such a significant sum of money before you know if you're going to be staying there. So there are plenty of investment opportunities to buy real estate in different countries, and you might not even want to live in those countries. You might just want a vacation rental on the beach in Mexico or Costa Rica. But when you are moving to a country and buying real estate becomes the first step in that relocation journey, that can sometimes be a mistake because you're then locking yourself in financially and from a maintenance perspective, and also energetically you're putting down ties in that place that one year later, two years later, five years later, you might decide that's not a good fit for you, and then that could hinder your ability to move in the future.  

Kristin:    00:11:40    And that's why even as a former real estate agent, I'm such a proponent of renting and living in a place before you buy and really getting to know what you're getting into before putting down a big deposit or sinking six or seven figures into a physical asset. The second mistake that is very common is to apply for a permanent residency or some sort of a long-term residency or work permit at the beginning. A lot of countries require you to apply for permanent residency from outside of the country, so before you even go there. And so if you're interested in going to a country, maybe Mexico or Portugal, and you go and live there for a while and then you want to apply for a specific type of long-term residency, you might have to then go back to your home country to start that process and then return.

Kristin:    00:12:40    So just like buying real estate, applying for permanent residency can be a quite expensive way to relocate to a new place, and it might not always be necessary. There's typically a lot of bureaucratic red tape when it comes to these types of permits. There is a cost associated with it, whether it's in time, application fees, proof of income, or making an investment in that country or paying a residency attorney to help you. And then once you meet those requirements, especially if those requirements are that you put a lump sum of money into a business or a bank account or into a property, you are then tied to that country for a certain number of years. In many cases, you may need to spend a certain number of days in that country to be able to maintain your residency status, and you may also need to pay taxes or pay into the social security system of that country.  

Kristin:    00:13:43    So when I was living in Costa Rica and I spent $700 on my first appointment with a lawyer to talk about what I would need to apply for residency, this process took two years. I had to go to consulates embassies, get papers documented, APO styled, certified notarized. It's like all of this stuff. And then at the end of the day, I realized that it would cost me so much more money to just maintain my permanent residency status in Costa Rica than if I just left the country every 90 days and took a vacation and came back in as a perpetual tourist. So there's gonna be some pros and cons to getting permanent residency status depending on your country of citizenship, your country of destination, and what your personal and professional goals are. Before the pandemic started, I was looking into getting citizenship through my ancestors in Europe or even applying for the Dutch American Friendship Treaty in the Netherlands to consider staying there and keeping the Netherlands as my home base for the next five years.  

Kristin:    00:14:58    But that was a decision I was taking based on having spent so much time in Amsterdam since 2013. So a big mistake that people make is applying for a permanent residency first before living in that country because you might not need or want it after you get there, especially with all of the new digital nomad visa programs that are coming out. It seems like a dime a dozen every month there is a new announcement of another country with their version of a remote work visa or digital nomad visa. The third mistake people make, and I've talked about this on the podcast before, is waiting too long to move. Now only you can be the judge of that only you know what your timeline is and how late is too late. You might have a plan to relocate and then never actually get around to it, or you might just keep putting off that date.  

Kristin:    00:15:57    There could be a lot of different reasons for this, but I've definitely seen people wait too long, not because I thought they waited too long, but because they told me that after all of the people that I've helped move to different countries, I've never had anyone say, I wish I didn't move, or I wish I waited longer to move by the time they relocate with me. And of course, I'm doing these individual one-on-one relocation. So these are typically people who have been thinking about it for a long time and saving up for their relocation for a long time, that by the time they move, they're having such a great experience that they wish that they did it sooner. But that's not always the case because the fourth mistake that I've seen people make, and these are typically not with my clients, but with just acquaintances, people that I've met while living in different countries, are the people that move before they're ready.  

Kristin:    00:16:56    And typically the people that are moving before they're ready, it has to do with your work status or your financial status. I have definitely met people that were living in other countries and ran out of money and couldn't even afford to get a plane ticket home. This is kind of the sink or swim method that sometimes works and sometimes doesn't. So, and some of you that I've talked to on the phone, we've talked about how there's two major pieces to the puzzle of location independence. You've got your financial independence and your location independence and financial independence doesn't mean that you have to be retired or retired early. It just means that you have some financial income stream to support you while you're traveling or living abroad. If you're just taking time off work or living off of your savings for a while, that's basically considered a sabbatical.  

Kristin:    00:17:57    But if you're doing this in a sustainable way where you want to be able to live a location, independent lifestyle from various countries or having different home bases and different places, you do need to have a source of income. It doesn't have to be a lot of income, but it has to be something. And you could get that ticket go abroad and then try to figure it out. But that's just a much more stressful and riskier way than having a plan or proof of impli implementation of your plan, that your financial plan works before you go abroad so that you can really enjoy the country that you're in. You can go out and meet people and you don't have to be stressed out about being able to buy food or pay your rent, pay your hostel. And I've talked about this a bit before on the podcast of how even when I studied abroad, I was a broke college student without a job except for waiting tables in the summer and teaching surf lessons.  

Kristin:    00:18:57    But I still had a source of income and that income came from scholarships that were paying my tuition that were giving me a weekly or monthly stipend to live off of that were paying for my housing, things like that. So I was able to actually lower my cost of living while living abroad as a college student versus living in Orlando in the UCF dorms. So you don't have to have a lot of money, you don't have to be retired, but you do wanna have some reliable source of income that can pay your way. The fifth mistake I've noticed happens after you get to the country, and this is when people spend too much time with other expats. So this is when you move to a country to get out of your comfort zone, but then you subconsciously stay in your comfort zone by mostly socializing with other like-minded people who are there from other countries.  

Kristin:    00:19:55    And I'm friends with thousands of expats. I have had so many good expat friends from the first days of living abroad, and I still do to this day, and I expect I'll meet many more, uh, expats in the future. And there's also a question on what is the definition of an expat, let's say people who are living in a country for a temporary amount of time versus immigrating to a country permanently. So you can be from any background, but it's also easy to spend more time with expats who are going through a shared experience than meeting the locals. Um, also because there might be a language barrier between you and the locals. So it's really important to be cognizant of that. It's so much fun to go to events from local expat organizations like InterNations or even digital nomad groups, Facebook group meetups, and people that you just meet along the way.  

Kristin:    00:20:57    But it's also important to make friends with locals and try to talk with people and get to know the culture from inside the country and not necessarily just as an outsider who's there temporarily. On the flip side of that is the sixth mistake that I've seen people make so often, and that is in letting your guard down in being too trusting. This could be of other expats or of locals. There's a lot of information online about how friendly the people are in different countries, but people are still people everywhere. And so don't do anything in a country that you move to that you wouldn't do in your home country. So a lot of times people feel too much of a sense of comfort because they're riding this high and euphoria of living abroad and they're just having a blast that they can be too trusting and maybe get into situations that are not optimal, maybe lose money, maybe get scammed.  

Kristin:    00:22:02    Um, you know, so if you were to meet a stranger on the street in your hometown, you strike up a conversation, you probably wouldn't invite them back to your house that day, <laugh> maybe. Um, but I have seen that happen so many times where people get to another country, the first people they meet, they're like inviting them over to dinner, and in some cases that can end up in getting their valuables stolen or you know, things can happen. So be open to serendipity, be open to making connections with people, but don't just throw caution to the wind and assume everything's gonna be sunshine and rainbows and unicorns, you know, still use common sense and take regular precautions as you would anywhere in the world. The seventh mistake people make is not learning the local language. This happens for a few reasons, but it's usually not because of having bad intentions.  

Kristin:    00:23:00    Usually it's because you go to a country where you just find it too difficult to learn the language. Uh, like I did when I went to Bulgaria, I thought this language looks very hard and I don't even wanna try. So I didn't try and I feel so bad about that. And it's really inexcusable after becoming fluent in Spanish. It's a combination of being intimidated by the language and also of not spending enough time in that country. So even if you're gonna be in a country for a week or a month, give yourself a crash course in that language. Go to a couple language classes, download a language learning app, look up some YouTube videos, put some intention and energy towards learning the language. And even if you learn some common phrases or the alphabet in the case of Bulgaria, that is going to go a long way into you feeling like you can find your place there and get your bearings, and also to be able to have some interactions and communications with the locals that you wouldn't otherwise be able to have.  

Kristin:    00:24:04    It's a slippery slope, this language learning, because I've met so many people who have lived abroad in the same country for years, and they just kind of got busy, you know, life got busy, they got caught up when with other things, and they never spent time in learning the language. And then 3, 5, 7 years later, they still hadn't become fluent. Whereas if they would've spent the first three months in an intensive language learning program, they would be good to go and that would carry them through for the next decades. The eighth mistake people make, which is usually not intentional, is expecting a country or culture to change or adapt to your expectations. And I say this is not intentional because typically the reason that you wanna go to another country is to immerse yourself in another culture, to learn more about those people, to learn more about yourself, to get out of your comfort zone.  

Kristin:    00:25:07    But we're still humans, we're still animals, and we want to stay safe and secure, and we don't like things that challenge our worldview or that threaten our sense of identity, our sense of self. And so this can be really insidious where you go to a country and you might not even be conscious that you're doing it, um, but you are getting frustrated with certain things or like, why isn't it like this? Or complaining or being resistant to certain ways of doing things. There, um, could be in disagreement with, uh, the political climate or the traffic. Anything expecting a country or a society to change to be more in line and in a fit with your worldview from home can just be a really frustrating experience. It's much better to go with the flow, and that is easier said than done. I've talked about on the podcast times where I've been at my witts end in frustration or like in conversations with people where I'm saying the sky is blue and they're like, no, it's actually green, and you just can't see eye to eye on things, and that can be really frustrating, but it's important to keep those expectations in check and remember that even if you learn the language, even if you become, um, a citizen of that country, you might still harbor some biases or some belief patterns from your home country or even from your old identity, if you wanna call it that from before you lived abroad.  

Kristin:    00:26:48    And, uh, that can kind of upset your daily life and a level of contentment. The ninth mistake, which is a little bit related to number eight, is not making a change when things aren't working for you. I've talked about this in some of my, what I love and what I don't love about living abroad videos, but I've met a lot of expats that don't like the way that things are. They stay stuck and they get stuck in this cycle of complaining versus making a change. When you are faced with a situation that you don't like, you can either accept it, change it, or leave the situation. And what I have seen is that some people don't make a decision either way or they spend years in a situation that they don't like. Before making this decision, you know, I did that video about why expats leave Costa Rica, and a lot of that was inspired by what I saw people posting about and complaining about in expat Facebook groups.  

Kristin:    00:28:00    And if you've spent any amount of time in those types of groups about any country, you know, it could be Spain or Ecuador or Mexico, there's always gonna be some negative Nancy's in there and some people complaining, but the mistake is just not to do anything about it. So if you find yourself in a place where, uh, you're no longer happy or fulfilled there, um, hopefully you don't have real estate and you don't have permanent residency, so you don't have any strong financial ties there, but just take some time to get curious about what's wrong, you know, try to troubleshoot. Does it mean a change of perspective? Does it mean changing your house? Does it mean changing your location to another country? And just try to figure out what it is that's bothering you? This is an issue in life regardless of where you're living or if you're living abroad or living at home.  

Kristin:    00:28:53    But this is just a pattern that I have witnessed, especially on social media among expats, that at one point in time it was their dream to go to this country and they're in that country, and they're really not happy, and instead of doing something about it, they just wanna go complain on Facebook. And then the 10th mistake, it kind of relates back to number three, which was waiting too long to move. And this is doing too much research. I used to actually tell my relocation clients, um, not to listen to any advice that they might get from people sitting next to them on the plane, because the more people that you ask their opinion on when you are making a life decision, the more variety of opinions you're going to get. And then the more those opinions all cancel out into zero. So if you are wondering if you should move to another country, or if you're trying to figure out which country to move to, and you're listening to podcasts and watching YouTube videos, and you're in Facebook groups and you're asking people that you know, and friends and family and coworkers, it's like all of those opinions are going to start clouding your judgment and your desire of what you wanna do.  

Kristin:    00:30:10    And it's not just asking other people what they would do, they aren't you. They can give you their opinions, but at the end of the day, it's something that's gonna come from within. But with the research, things are changing so fast that you could spend six months or a year researching and planning your move, and then by the end of that time, everything that you've researched is now outdated. And so you can kind of get in this hamster wheel of research where it's like infinite. You can never do enough research because the information is always changing. The world is changing really fast, and it's changing faster now since the pandemic started than it feels like it ever has before in our lifetime. And so just be cognizant of how much research you're doing, how many people you are asking, and you know, remember to check in with yourself as well.  

Kristin:    00:31:06    Maybe set some deadlines for yourself, some time limits so that you don't spend years researching your international relocation in a time that you could be spending those years in a different country. And you know what? I just wanna add a bonus mistake in here. And mistake number 11 is going where everyone else is going. So when you're moving abroad, this is your chance to go where you really want to go, to see a place that you've always wanted to see to live in a culture that you've always been curious about experiencing. So if you wanna go move to Timbuktu <laugh> and no one can understand why, then who cares? Go anyway. So if you are drawn to a specific place in the world and it's not on someone's top three or top five or top 10 list on the internet, then it's for a reason.  

Kristin:    00:32:06    And um, go heeded the call. Listen to that call. Go try to figure out why you're curious about that place before it's too late. There are valid reasons for why the most popular places to live, whether it's for retirees or digital nomads or everything in between, or maybe you're a combination of all of those things. There's a reason why some of those places consistently rank at the top. Maybe it's climate, cost of living community, or a combination of all of those things, but there are also some wild cards and X factors that might be for you. So this is your chance to really take a step into a new lifestyle, do something new, do something you've never done before, do something that other people might not approve of or understand, and you never know what's gonna come out of it. And if you're planning to relocate in the next year or so and you'd just like some support and guidance along your journey, then I would like to invite you to apply for my new relocation program Ready to Relocate, where I'll be teaching you everything you need to know to successfully move or slow travel overseas.  

Kristin:    00:33:19    Ready to Relocate is an eight-week mentorship program. We'll learn how to move to any country in the world in just 60 days so you can spend your time actually living abroad, relaxing, working, doing whatever it is you want to do, rather than spending countless hours researching online how to make it happen, only to be left with uncertainty that what you've read or researched or watched is even accurate or up to date in Ready to Relocate. I'll be simplifying this complex process for you, sharing with you my exact framework for how I've been able to help more than a thousand people relocate to different countries in the last 10 years. I'll be sharing with you all of my templates and checklists for budgeting, packing, and planning. You'll get a guide to create your own custom relocation plan, and you'll learn step-by-step what you need to do and strategies for everything from getting started with your journey, where to move, how to find housing abroad, what to do to prepare for your departure with all of the logistics, and then what happens after your move, adapting to life abroad, learning the language, what to do about healthcare, opening an offshore bank account, food, shopping, utilities, Wi-Fi, and more.  

Kristin:    00:34:46    Everything you need to know to travel overseas and sustain this lifestyle long-term. This relocation program is truly my life's work, and it's a lot different from my individual relocation services, which are done for you. This program is to be done with you, so you'll have plenty of support from me and my team. You'll have unlimited daily access to private messaging, weekly live group Q&A calls, and lifetime access to all of the modules, downloads, and video trainings in the course, plus recorded weekly live Q&As. You'll also get access to updates on the information, because let's face it, the world is changing fast information is changing fast, whether it's visas, paperwork, immigration regulations, covid, travel restrictions, things are always changing. So you'll have that lifetime access for updates. My hope is that if you've ever struggled or hesitated with facing the overwhelming process of handling all the logistics of moving abroad on your own, then I invite you to reach out and book a free call with me. I'll put the link in the podcast description, or you can also send an email to info@orbisrelocation.com, O R B I S, or at travelingwithKristin.com/apply. Thanks for listening today. I hope that today's podcast helps you avoid a lot of the mistakes that I've seen when people move abroad and see you all again next week.