Let's Talk About Your Dreams and What To Do About Them

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Sneak Peek:

Kristin:    00:00:30    By virtue of this location, independent lifestyle, we have millions of people around the world who are proving through doing that. They don't need anything besides themselves. All you need is your ideas and your creativity and your impetus to achieve your goals. And then you can come up with the resources that you need to do that. You can pick things up along the way. You know, all you need is your mind, your heart, your soul identity, and the internet really, and a work ethic. 

Welcome to Badass Digital Nomads, where we're pushing the boundaries of remote work and travel, all while staying grounded with a little bit of old school philosophy, self-development and business advice from our guests.

Kristin:  Today's episode is sponsored by me. Did you know you can now shop my favorite remote work tools, video production equipment, and travel accessories directly from your Amazon account? It's true. Just go to TravelingwithKristin.com/amazon to check out all the products I use and love.  

Kristin:    00:01:58    Hey guys, welcome back to another episode of Badass Digital Nomads. And today it's just us. We're just hanging out one-on-one and it is a Saturday afternoon. I'm hanging out in my back patio in my new house in Miami where I'll be for the next few months. And I'm just so happy. I'm feeling so calm and grounded and content and just in such a good mood because I know that I'm not traveling anywhere for the next couple months and just really loving life here in February in South Florida. It's like perfect weather and life is good. Lots of stuff going on here, lots of friends in town and lots of work being done. But this podcast isn't really about that. It's just why I am recording this, um, solo episode because I woke up in such a good mood. I worked out, I've had my coffee, I had a nice breakfast, listened to a podcast, do I like cooked?  

Kristin:    00:03:03    And uh, can we just say for a minute how awesome podcasts are? I mean, I just love this time we're living in. I love listening to podcasts. I love making them. And I know that you guys love podcasts too because you're listening right now, <laugh>. So, but this podcast isn't about me, it's about you because I wanna talk about your dreams for a minute. You know, man, it stops raining <laugh>. I had actually brought my computer outside to the dock. Let me just describe where I am right now. I have this back patio that's open, um, with a nice table overlooking the water. So it's like a private backyard, but it's just a concrete patio that goes down a few steps to this dock on a canal in Miami. And my apartment was built in 1940, so it's so quiet and peaceful like old Florida style with a mango tree in my backyard.  

Kristin:    00:04:02    And every single day I take my work breaks outside and I just sit on the dock and stare into space <laugh>. And, um, I was thinking that would be a great place to record the podcast. But I brought my laptop out there and it immediately started raining for five minutes. I came back inside and now I'm sitting on a beanbag just in my, um, sliding glass door opening, just looking outside and it stopped raining, but whatever, I'm not going back out there. Anyway, this podcast in general, badass digital nomads is about kind of the unlimited number of ways that you can create the life you've always envisioned for yourself. So maybe that's one that seems too good to be true. Maybe you're even afraid to tell anyone about it or admit it to yourself or say it out loud that this life is what you want.  

Kristin:    00:05:01    And this life being a life that you create for yourself or designed for yourself, that can be lived from anywhere, you know, location, independent. You don't have to be tied to any specific place or even a specific job or anything. Like, you can just be the full realization actualization of yourself in this unprecedented time in history. And how do we do that? How well, how have I tried to illustrate that is through people, through examples of other people and what they've done. Because even though everybody's story is unique and different, including your own, of course when we hear about how other people did things and we talk about their different paths, a little piece of that I think resonates with you in some way. So maybe in one episode or one person's story, like half of it is really just like sending off alarm bells in your head or in your body.  

Kristin:    00:06:06    You're like, yes, yes, I totally get this, I'm so on board with this, or whatever. And then maybe in other episodes you're like, ah, well I I took about 10% of that or 1%, but that one word or one sentence or one phrase or one example from one person's life can set your life in a totally new and amazing direction. So that's what I'm trying to do on the podcast. But because of that and because to be location independent or to work for yourself or to be financially free, it has to do with business and career, right? So that's a way to show how you can live a life of freedom. But in this specific episode, I just wanted to pause for a second and, and talk about your dreams in general, your goals for life, your ideas, because they might not have anything to do with work necessarily, or even money.  

Kristin:    00:07:09    Money is just a means to an end. It's just a way to survive in this world and it's just an exchange of value. Uh, I actually was watching yesterday a YouTube video recommended by my friend Ayo, the author. I'll link to it in the show notes. And it was Ray Dalio, the author of Principles, which was one of the books that I read last year that was on my reading list with Diddy. And they were having a meeting and talking about life. I think Diddy had like invited him over and they filmed this me mentor mastermind meeting in his living room. Apparently that's what it looked like. And they were talking about how when you just get good at something or good enough that the money comes. And they were kind of laughing about how they didn't even care about money. And I don't know if both of them are billionaires, Ray Dalio definitely is a billionaire, but they were saying how the irony of their situation is that they don't really care about money.  

Kristin:    00:08:09    It's more about their ideas and their dreams and like playing the game, the game being like what they think is fun to do. And so in the spirit of that, just thinking about who you are and who you were born as, that's part of who you are today. You know, your dreams and your hopes and ideas and aspirations are never going to go away. So if there's anything I've learned getting older, it's that. So it, you're alive if you're listening to this right now. You have a dream, you might have more than one. What is it? What are they? You know, it's easy to look at other people who are apparently living their dreams and think that they were born with some kind of special power or circumstances and maybe they were born into some sort of privilege. But the truth is, regardless of your circumstances, you have it too.  

Kristin:    00:09:14    You have, by virtue of being alive, you have the power to be who you want and to create what you want and to manifest what you want in the world. And Ray Dalio and Diddy are two really good examples of that, of people who came from nothing and created something out of nothing. And the crux of the matter is that's how it works. We come into the world with nothing but our bodies and our minds and our souls and we leave the same way. But along the way we are taught that we need to acquire this, uh, knowledge and stuff and resources and it just a lot of baggage to be able to achieve happiness or whatever it is that the goal is in life. And that's just not true. That's not true because by virtue of this location, independent lifestyle, we have millions of people around the world who are proving through doing that.  

Kristin:    00:10:18    They don't need anything besides themselves. All you need is your ideas and your creativity and your impetus to achieve your goals. And then you can come up with the resources that you need to do that. You know, you can pick things up along the way. You know, all you need is your mind, your heart, your soul identity and the internet really, and a work ethic and just some patience, persistence, work and just keep going. And that's all you need. You know, you just need a pair of shoes, <laugh> a device connected to the internet and your ideas and you can just go from there. So it can hurt. Sometimes we feel pain when we see people doing what we want. Like if you see somebody on social media doing what you wanna do, you might feel like a punch in the gut. Like, oh, that could be you.  

Kristin:    00:11:18    That's what you wanna do. Or, you know you can do that. Or you see who you are and you want to be that person. Maybe that is a hint, that is a sign towards something that maybe you should pursue. You know, if you feel jealousy or you feel like discomfort in your body when you see someone else doing something that you know you could do in an alternate universe or maybe in this one, maybe in this life, Brian Koppelman and Steven Pressfield had a podcast together. Brian Koppelman is a writer. He's the writer of Billions and the host of the moment podcast. And he says, or they were saying in their conversation, the only thing that gets the pain to stop is to try to create, to do your thing. And they were talking to the resistance. You know, the resistance from being who you are in the world, the resistance from doing what you were meant to do in this world.  

Kristin:    00:12:19    And everybody suffers from this type of pain. So Pressfield says that you have to be okay with not operating at your highest level immediately, but just to remember that you are capable and if you don't go for it, whatever it is in this life, you'll pay for it in the next one. You have to hit the bottom one day and then say, why can't I do that? And that's what, that's what you need to do. The good life is possible for everyone, especially you. And reality on this planet is an illusion, it's a perception. And that perception is malleable. If you are alive today, you were born with the tools that you need to thrive on this planet in this time of history. And as I was saying, the existence and the reality of a location, independent lifestyle is just an embodiment of that reality.  

Kristin:    00:13:19    What millions of people are doing right now is proof that you don't need anything except an idea and work ethic and just starting. You know, you can TRAs around this planet happily ever after into infinity with just a backpack. But to do that, you have to see yourself first as a creator of your own reality and recognize that you have infinite capabilities. Anything you need, you can learn it or you can acquire it along the way. One of my favorite authors, the late William Zener once said, in a talk to college graduates that you should quote, be wary of security as a goal. He says, it may often look like the best prize, but usually it's not. And I think that pretty much sums it up because I think the reason a lot of people aren't happy is because they've pursued security as a goal for so many years or so many decades.  

Kristin:    00:14:23    And then if they achieved it, they realized it wasn't all it's cracked up to be. And that's why they want to travel. They want adventure. They want something that money can't buy. So what is it for you? In another book that I am, uh, reading right now, Skin in the Game by Nassim Taleb, he says that many of the things we believe were invented by universities or by other people, but that the knowledge we get by tinkering around in trial and error and experience and contact with the earth are superior to everything else. He says, the doer wins by doing. And instead of being afraid of taking risk, you should ask yourself, what is a risk you can't afford not to take? What is the inverse? Instead of seeing something as being a big scary hurdle, what is that thing that if you don't do it, you might as well die as Brian Koppelman and Steven Pressfield say they have the courage to admit that they couldn't live with themselves if they didn't pursue their dreams.  

Kristin:    00:15:37    And for them it was writing for you. It's something else. What is it? I hope we can figure it out in this episode, Taleb also writes that quote, heroes are people of deeds who are endowed in the spirit of risk taking. He's basically saying that it's okay to make mistakes for the rest of your life. You know, that's part of it. But the one thing you can't do is avoid yourself. The other thing you can't do is ignore your dreams. He says that he writes because that's what he was designed to do, just as a knife cuts, because that's what its mission is. That's it. It's as simple as that. Guys, what were you designed to do? It doesn't have to be a career or moneymaking activity. Who are you? What were you designed to do? Maybe it's something that you've never told anyone before, or maybe it's something that you just kept pushing down and saying it's not time or, or you don't have enough time or you don't have enough money or skills.  

Kristin:    00:16:44    Or even if it's not skill-based, if it's just who you are as your identity. You know, this is a completely off topic from what we usually talk about, but a friend recently admitted to me that he thinks he might be gay and he's never explored that, but he's in a committed relationship and he's known this since he was really young, but he just didn't, he didn't identify with it for some reason. And so maybe that's one of his dreams that his dreams to come out of the closet. And whether he does that or not, I don't know. And I don't know what the answer is to that because it's complicated, but it's just an example that your dream of like who you are and what you wanna do. Like it doesn't even have to be ambition related or achievement related. My friend Ayodeji, Ayo, the author as I was talking about earlier in his book, real Help that I, um, that I just read very quickly, it was so good.  

Kristin:    00:17:51    It was also on my reading list. And um, you can buy it in the show notes, but he says it's common to rationalize why you've been living below your potential. You're afraid to be yourself. He writes in his new book that you have to just own what you want and ask for it or go get it. And he also says that all perceived barriers in your life are mostly imaginary, while also acknowledging that society is designed in a way for for you to fail or for at least for you to stay in step with the masses, you know, for you to not step outside the box for you to follow the rules, for you to comply with social and societal order. So today I want you to put any perceived limitations, any perceived barriers, as Ayodeji says on hold. So take it out of the equation.  

Kristin:    00:18:51    Anything you can think of, any excuse that you've ever had or any protest from your subconscious, whether it's time, knowledge, skills, money, pride, sunk costs, everything, everything out of your head, responsibilities, duties, I don't know anything. Just press pause on this podcast right now. Stop what you're doing. I'll wait <laugh>, just stop what you're doing for one minute, okay? And think about your dream. The first thing that pops into your head, just the first thing that just percolates out of your subconscious and just acknowledge it. That's it. Okay, so just press pause. The first thing that comes into your head could be a dream from when you are seven years old. What is it? Say hi to it. Don't be afraid. Don't be intimidated by it. Just accept it. Just see it as a part of who you are, you know, as just an extension of yourself.  

Kristin:    00:19:54    And for just a minute, just feel the possibility of it coming through to fruition. Just feel what it would be like if that was you right now, if you were publicly living that dream, doing that activity, being that person. And that's it. If that's all you can muster today, just that image that flash into your brain, I think that's enough. But if you wanna take it a step farther, think of one thing that you can do to bring yourself an inch or a centimeter or a millimeter towards that goal. So instead of just being stagnant, maybe this is a goal you've had for 30 years or more, maybe you're not even 30 yet <laugh>. Just take one tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny shuffle towards it, whatever it is. What would you do first? And I'll use myself as an example because this is such a weird dream that I've always had that is so embarrassing that you can probably like hear my voice change.  

Kristin:    00:21:03    I think I've maybe mentioned this before, but it's on my mind because I was practicing it last night. So ever since I was a kid I wanted to be a DJ <laugh>. I just picture myself as like a DJ and I start laughing. But at the time I thought DJs were just people who like played music at weddings. But regardless, I would sit in my room and mix music on tape decks. Does anybody remember dual tape decks? So I was, um, a gymnast and a cheerleader as a teenager and I would choreograph our cheerleading routines and I would make the music for our routines. And um, yeah, I mean I was like 14, 15 and forever. I just ignored that and talked myself out of it. And um, my mom forced me to play piano for 10 years and I thought I always sucked at piano.  

Kristin:    00:21:56    And my grandfather was this great violinist who got into Julliard and I was like, I played piano for 10 years and I still sucked at it, but yet I had this desire in my head to mix music or produce music. And so like fast forward 20 years and a year ago, I took a couple DJ classes, I took one in Amsterdam and I took some in Bueno Aires in Spanish, which was really difficult. <laugh> trying to learn how to mix music in a foreign language. I was like, what did I sign up for? But it was really cheap. You could get like 10 classes for the price of one in uh, Amsterdam. So anyway, then for a year I basically didn't practice at all 'cause I've just been working and traveling and I don't know, I wasn't gonna travel with any a DJ controller. But now that I'm in Miami, I bought an online course to learn how to dj and that's kind of been my reward for working every day.  

Kristin:    00:22:57    So if I do everything on my to-do list, like my top three most important tasks, then at night after my evening workout and after dinner I can just play around and learn how to dj. And so that's what I was doing last night. Like whether it's for 15 minutes or an hour or more, I just tinker around as Nassim Taleb says, just tinker around and play with the software and build my collection of music. And that's it. Like I've just learned a lot even in the last week of doing this. And I was thinking to myself last night, why would I rather do this than go out on a Friday night? And it's because I am giving myself space to work on my dream, my like silly dream of learning how to mix music. And I don't know why <laugh>, but I'm honoring it, you know?  

Kristin:    00:23:58    So who cares how weird or dumb or embarrassing or vulnerable you feel when you practice your dream or when you acknowledge it? And so the first step for me was just looking at YouTube tutorials and then realizing that that was gonna take a really long time and I should just get a course. So there's a $20 or $10 online course on Udemy intro to DJ stuff. Am I gonna make money at this? No, maybe in like 10 years from now or something. But it doesn't matter if I am doing it in the comfort of my own living room at midnight on a Friday night where no one can see me. So you were meant for more in this world. I know that for a fact because we were all meant for more than we were led to believe. The sooner you accept that and run with it, the better, the happier you'll be.  

Kristin:    00:24:56    So if you feel like you're wasting your life or some of your life, then you're probably right, but you're not alone. You're in the majority. I think everybody feels like that. And that is part of the angst and that's part of the pain that Steven Pressfield and Brian Koppelman are and Ayodeji and everybody talks about and writes about, is that pain of not living up to your potential. That you are the only one who knows what it is. It's between you and God or you and the universe. But when you don't live up to your potential and when you don't take risks and go outside of your comfort zone and face the fear and do it anyway, then it affects us too. It affects the other people in the world. It affects all of humanity when you don't let yourself be yourself. If Steven Pressfield didn't pick himself up off the floor from his apartment with no electricity and Ayodeji as well, I think both of them were just living in in financial ruin and in the pain of wanting to be writers and not being good writers, if they didn't get up and do it anyway and start writing, then five years later Ayodeji wouldn't have written this book that was so helpful to so many people.  

Kristin:    00:26:24    He wouldn't have 54,000 followers on medium, and Steven Pressfield wouldn't be talking to Brian Koppelman on a podcast that's reaching hundreds of thousands of people and he wouldn't have written a ton of bestselling books and come up with concepts, concept and principles that people have copied and talked about and taught about for so many years since he released his ideas to the public. So let's talk about your dreams, guys, or you don't have to talk about it, just write something down. Write something down in your journal, type it into a note on your phone. What is your dream? What is one of your dreams? Just start with one. And what can you do today to inch a little bit closer to it? That's it. <laugh>. The entire time I recorded this podcast, it's been sunny and not raining, but I am still getting a nice view of the green mango trees in front of me and the water and the wind and the leaves and so pretty.  

Kristin:    00:27:36    But you know, from back here, it just kind of looks like a brown canal. But I notice when I go closer is when I really see what's going on in there. When I get closer, I see how clear the water is and I start to look deeper. And then I see all the fish in the whole ecosystem of the estuary and I see frogs and I saw a manatee the other day and I see the leaves falling into the water and it's like that's how life is. There's the surface and then there's below. What is above is below and there's what you look like to other people on the outside. And then there's who you are on the inside. And if you look a little bit closer, you're gonna see a lot more than meets the eye. So have a great week everybody, and see you next week on another episode of Badass Digital Nomads. I'm super excited for all of the amazing guests we have coming up. Got a lot of people booked for the next few weeks and months, and so many surprises in store. So definitely stay tuned. Leave a review and see you next time. Oh, and if you wanna share what your dream is with me, you can do that <laugh>, send me an email to hello@TravelingwithKristin.com.  

Kristin:    00:29:05    Thanks so much for listening to help support this podcast and help it grow. Please leave a review in the Apple podcast store and send this or your favorite episode to a friend for weekly travel videos, live streams, and even more interviews. Make sure to subscribe to my YouTube channels at youtube.com/digitalnomad and Traveling with Kristin. See you soon.  

Advertisement:    00:29:56    BP is working to roll out EV charging hubs in the UK and we're keeping oil and gas flowing from the North Sea. It's, and not all, that's how BP is backing Britain. While today we're mostly in oil and gas, we increased the proportion of our global annual investment that went into our lower carbon and other transition businesses from around 3% in 2019 to around 23% in 2023. bp.com/andnotall.